Trailer Trash Yoga

Susan Powter: Valley of the Lesbian Doll

I stepped on the scale this morning and it groaned. Gads, this time of year is difficult. I have zero motivation, a huge appetite. I feel constrained by this body, as if it is getting in the way of my doing the things I love to do.

It’s not as if I’m lying around the house making garbage angels. It’s just that my internal motivation, my commitment to myself, fails me when the meds or the time of year sap my will.

I was allowing myself a small bout of self-loathing this morning as I read email, and what should arrive? An email from none other than Susan Powter. You remember her, the exhuberant, crew-cut exercise guru? She’s back, better than ever, with a new hairdo, a new website, and the same old infectious exuberance.

I definitely have trouble staying motivated. I am confident that SP can motivate me – her book “Stop the Insanity!” made a big difference a couple of years ago – but I seem to disconnect from my commitment. Yes, I have discussed this problem with my shrink. We’ve concluded that my psych meds are messing with my dopamine levels, and this messes with the connection between intention and action. The best answer is to reduce the psych meds, and I am trying to figure out a strategy.

I would like to pass on a concept. Motivation is something that comes from outside. Motivation is what gets you started. To continue after the external motivation has lost its power, we must also develop a commitment to ourselves. Commitment is internal and can’t be extinguished by external forces.

I’ll be watching Susan Powter’s new webpage with interest.

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